tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47344407660246962202024-02-22T05:28:23.450+13:00Wayne GrimseyA blog from the far flung archipelago of New ZealandWayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.comBlogger82125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-1717320604209991682013-09-14T13:02:00.000+12:002013-09-15T09:41:17.239+12:00A Man For All Seasons: A Post Mortem of Sir Thomas More.<br />
A fantastic season of this great play (by Robert Bolt) has drawn to a close.<br />
<br />
Performed by members of the Cambridge Repertory Society.<br />
<br />
Directed by Dave Stearns <br />
<br />
At the Gaslight Theatre, Cambridge, New Zealand.<br />
<br />
I went along to audition for a part, back in June. Dave offered me the part of Chapuys' Attendant, which I enthusiastically grabbed with both hands. This part had a grand total of 8 lines - which made learning my lines a cinch! This gave me plenty of time to work on my visual acting and develop my delivery.<br />
<br />
Most scenes I appeared in, were in a non-speaking capacity, as an apprentice, in support of Eustace Chapuys (played by Michael Cole).<br />
<br />
Behind the scenes, my role as Chapuys' apprentice also took on another dimension, as I was asked by Dave Stearns to be Chapuys' understudy! This was a contingency plan, just in case Michael was called away at short notice - due to family illness. I learnt all of Chapuys' lines in about 3-4 days!<br />
<br />
Fortunately, Michael's relative appeared to remain in a stable state of health. Since I had learnt Chapuys' part, Dave Stearns and Mike kindly offered me the opportunity to play Signor Chapuys for 3 of the performances. As I had only started learning Chapuys' part, a fortnight prior to opening night, I was still in the throes of developing my delivery. I can't help but wonder how much better I could have delivered this part, had I some more time. I still managed to get the job done, ... and I was very grateful for the opportunity.<br />
<br />
The acting by the cast was incredibly superb. Everyone suited their roles to a tee.<br />
<br />
Some memorable moments:<br />
<br />
Dave Moore (who played Thomas Cromwell) injured his back, and required crutches for a few days. He adapted his role of Thomas Cromwell by accessorizing hinself with a tudor style walking stick - which he continued to use on stage, even when his back had recovered. He was so convincing in the role, that you could have sworn that he really did threaten like a dockside bully!<br />
<br />
In one performance, The Common Man (played by Jason Lonsdale) inadvertently introduced Cardinal Thomas Cranmer (played by Ben Corcoran) as the Archbishop of Cranberry! This was obviously a portmanteau of 'Cranmer' and 'Canterbury'. Poor Dave Stearns (who played the main role of Sir Thomas More) was trying hard not to laugh - whilst languishing in a jail cell on centre stage!<br />
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The Common Man also had to overcome an extraordinary level of onstage multi-tasking - i.e. shifting chairs, tables, baskets. lighting candles and pouring drinks, whilst simultaneously delivering his lengthy monologues. A tough ask for any guy.<br />
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Richard Ritch (played by Ryan Wolf Holden) appeared in one showing, substituting a misplaced quill with his finger! Darn missing props!<br />
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King Henry VIII's (played by Ben Corcoran) delivery of "I have no Queen!" was so impassionate. I can still hear that line echoing off the hills around the Waipa region!<br />
<br />
Sir Thomas More (played by Dave Stearns) had far more dialogue than everyone else, yet Murphy's Law stipulated that he must be the one to incur a hoarse voice, due to his efforts in holding off a cold. Coincidentally, it was well documented that Sir Thomas More struggled with an on-going cold, so I guess this just authenticated Dave's superb characterisation of Sir Thomas even further.<br />
<br />
<br />
Eustace Chapuys' (played by Michael Cole) would occasionally insert substitute lines to replace the ones which had simply evaded his memory! His references to Queen Catherine as "Queen Anne", King Henry as "King John" and describing Latin as an "angelic language" in lieu of a holy language raised a few chuckles. Apparently, Bishop Fisher of Rochester ended up also being known as Bishop Fisher of Rockhampton! <br />
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Cardinal Thomas Wolsey (played by Peter Carr) was often dealing with unruly candles which would extinguish prematurely ,... oh, and who can forget the 21st century gas lighter gun, used by The Common Man!<br />
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Did I have a clean slate in all this? No way! My crimes were mostly committed backstage.<br />
<br />
I inadvertently put on William Roper's (played by Steve McMurray) shoes, prior to an earlier performance. You'd think that after receiving one good reprimand by Steve, I'd have leant my lesson well. But oh no, prior to the peultimate performance, I graduated to inadvertently targeting William Roper again by putting on his t-shirt. Luckily for me, Steve is not of a homicidal disposition!<br />
<br />
I just want to say a huge thanks to Dave Stearns for giving me the great opportunity to be a part of this play. And thanks to everyone in the cast and crew for all your support, fun and friendship.<br />
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<br />Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-59983176510553290892013-08-05T22:40:00.001+12:002013-08-05T22:40:31.037+12:00Worse Than A Hangover.A 64-year-old man has told how he passed out after a heavy night drinking and woke up to find that his penis was missing.<br />
Neighbours of Geraldo Ramos claim that he was attacked by a dog as he stumbled around the Dominican Republic naked while drunk.<br />
But Mr Ramos, of Santiago, doesn't believe their version of events and is none-the-wiser as to how he came to be dismembered.<br />
Mr Ramos now has to wear a catheter and was filmed recuperating at his home.<br />
He says that he has learned his lesson - Mr Ramos said that he is to lay off the drink from now on.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-49237026682116793962013-07-04T18:37:00.000+12:002013-07-04T18:47:46.199+12:00Mother-In-Law Joke With A Difference.<div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law boiling angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase.<br />
"What happened?" she asks anxiously.</span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br />
"What happened!! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife
telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip.
</span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">I
get home... and guess what I found? Yes, your daughter, my Glenda, with
a naked guy in our marital bed! This is unforgiveable, the end of our
marriage.
I'm done. I'm leaving forever!"<br />
<br />
"Calm down, calm down!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here, she would never do such a thing!
</span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">There must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened."<br />
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Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.<br />
"I told you there must be a simple explanation ....</span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">she didn't receive your E-mail!"</span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
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Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-12716943528921995792012-09-05T18:34:00.000+12:002012-09-05T18:36:46.422+12:00 Missing woman unwittingly joins search party looking for herself<div>
<span style="font-family: Tahoma; font-size: x-small;"></span><br /></div>
A group of tourists spent hours Saturday night looking for a missing woman
near Iceland's Eldgja canyon, only to find her among the search party.
<br />
<br />
The group was travelling through Iceland on a tour bus and stopped near
the volcanic canyon in the southern highlands Saturday afternoon, reports the
Icelandic news organization mbl.is. <br />
<br />
One of the women on the bus left to
change her clothes and freshen up. When she came back, her busmates didn't
recognize her. <br />
<br />
Soon, there was word of a missing passenger. <b>The woman
didn't recognize the description of herself, and joined in the search.</b>
<br />
<br />
About 50 people searched the terrain by vehicles and on foot. The coast
guard was even readying a helicopter to help. <br />
<br />
But the search was called
off at about 3 a.m., when it became clear the missing woman was, in fact,
accounted for and searching for herself.
Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-27306125078455623942012-01-06T01:22:00.001+13:002012-01-06T01:23:25.925+13:00Dog ban issued after puppy gets drunk<div id="story_features_empty"></div>A British court has barred a man from having a dog for three years after his Labrador puppy was discovered drunk. <br />
Matthew Cox had been drinking vodka and coke with his roommate on August 22 when he left his glass on the floor to go for a smoke. <br />
He returned to find that his six-month-old dog, Max, had swallowed the booze. <br />
But he left the animal at home, and prosecutor Maria Moore told Nottingham Magistrate's Court in central England that the puppy was later spotted staggering and falling over near Cox's home. <br />
Police were called and took the dog to an emergency vet, where it was put on a drip to flush the alcohol out of its system. <br />
Magistrate J A Smith called the incident "downright stupid". <br />
The puppy has since been given a new home.<br />
<br />
This begs the question; How on earth does a puppy develop the taste for an alcoholic beverage? <br />
<br />
Mind you, having asked that, I have noticed over the years, some of my mates have had dogs which have had a tendency to consume all manner of matter (organic or not), at quite an express speed.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-89068643790225941792011-09-15T18:55:00.006+12:002011-09-15T19:16:25.532+12:00Cashel Street, Christchurch: Before and After the February 22nd Earthquake<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9aIcNV7TQKSS3xmvdEN798-DC6Il8fkzS32ku5a3S3iQ_XZfrpRZiv3Lf3K_oHFatDpfYgK0-IO8OygMF8FJkV1aUhebKPNJiO6OVoP38pafPLUuedQwwgMjjscNwx-JQ4pPrl0s9EvI/s1600/image001.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 180px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9aIcNV7TQKSS3xmvdEN798-DC6Il8fkzS32ku5a3S3iQ_XZfrpRZiv3Lf3K_oHFatDpfYgK0-IO8OygMF8FJkV1aUhebKPNJiO6OVoP38pafPLUuedQwwgMjjscNwx-JQ4pPrl0s9EvI/s320/image001.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5652477453255714130" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLBOgFCq7ehmSyYGNuhLEYJ0Sm_orzA8thMDPQezX3awmIEXsatLWr-Wsi7FMztME83ekU_A3TM4BnLBN3L4C8KM84wJslWbQOGMaQua8ojuRAHqknq4lthXKgL5G6cTESFdTWmZvZPyw/s1600/image002.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 162px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLBOgFCq7ehmSyYGNuhLEYJ0Sm_orzA8thMDPQezX3awmIEXsatLWr-Wsi7FMztME83ekU_A3TM4BnLBN3L4C8KM84wJslWbQOGMaQua8ojuRAHqknq4lthXKgL5G6cTESFdTWmZvZPyw/s320/image002.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5652478165946687314" border="0" /></a><br />Both photos are views looking down Cashel Street towards the Bridge of Rememberance War Memorial. The only difference being, that the top one was before that fateful day in February.<br />I have fond memories of visiting some great shops in this street and hanging out with my Christchurch mates.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-70538605790484520172011-06-02T19:23:00.010+12:002011-06-02T20:09:53.025+12:00Highlander's Super Rugby Franchise Jersey - Green?I am opposed to the idea of the Highlanders jersey being overhauled to a predominantly green colour scheme.<br /><br />The colours in the top have traditionally been blue, gold(yellow) and maroon. This scheme represented the combined colours of North Otago, Otago and Southland.<br /><br />Apparently, the Highlanders franchise has confirmed the new jersey, which is believed to be light green with a dark blue strip down the sides will be worn as a once-off this season on Friday night against the Western Force in Dunedin, ahead of a permanent move to the new strip next season. This fixture is also the last game of Super Rugby to be played at the 'Brook.<br /><br />Long term, I reckon that the Highlanders franchise should adopt a tartan pattern based on the blue, yellow and maroon - which could potentially avoid a jersey clash with all the other teams in Super Rugby. Another option, could be a mainly maroon colour with a little bit of blue and gold.<br /><br />Whatever happens, I sincerely hope they don't do away with the Highlanders logo, and that hopefully, they drop the green colour scheme next year.<br /><br />Despite having been away from the South Island for almost two and a half years (barring two visits), I still strongly support the Highlanders - through thick and thin. I have a Highlanders flag donning my workstation, at my Waikato place of work.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6hxuC8KRHShdqze2hnvUE5bJqO9s-PVUqRs28oqlDik_0ryuz_mkarJQGYPBjqbJtkRpqiPn8K_ThfhTpuNVsSx8OMduDcCheMj73DhO7LFu4ThC1zHH_tvB1a2KV8iZRg976HG4LlMA/s1600/All%252BBlacks%252BTraining%252BSession%252BKOkZcFYN-nDl.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6hxuC8KRHShdqze2hnvUE5bJqO9s-PVUqRs28oqlDik_0ryuz_mkarJQGYPBjqbJtkRpqiPn8K_ThfhTpuNVsSx8OMduDcCheMj73DhO7LFu4ThC1zHH_tvB1a2KV8iZRg976HG4LlMA/s320/All%252BBlacks%252BTraining%252BSession%252BKOkZcFYN-nDl.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5613529517932018034" border="0" /></a>Could the new Highlanders jersey end up looking similar to this All Blacks training strip?Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-32951090244151969742011-06-02T19:17:00.006+12:002011-06-02T20:10:32.702+12:00Junk Mail<h6 class="uiStreamMessage" ft="{"type":"msg"}" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="messageBody" style="font-size:180%;">Found it ironic, that the delivery pe</span><span class="messageBody" style="font-size:180%;">rson who dispatched some circulars in our letterbox, included a used Chupa Chup stick, sandwiched between 2 pages. This really enforces the concept of "junk mail".</span></h6><h6 face="arial" class="uiStreamMessage" ft="{"type":"msg"}"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGcYrrSz4hLAZnjAKax-LgfblE81pFsScbF78zpaTjajkD0zRlpSn3XDp3w4E-k_ZhxhAAUtwJsRole3nsdlTGkUq-VmZy6ur9tRrcXRw3VhiDbHX8iQMe6h-_qBqSkjn6KHGdr2II5us/s1600/JunkMail.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 264px; height: 191px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGcYrrSz4hLAZnjAKax-LgfblE81pFsScbF78zpaTjajkD0zRlpSn3XDp3w4E-k_ZhxhAAUtwJsRole3nsdlTGkUq-VmZy6ur9tRrcXRw3VhiDbHX8iQMe6h-_qBqSkjn6KHGdr2II5us/s320/JunkMail.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5613518856049281458" border="0" /></a></h6>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-58317283100780386082011-05-06T19:30:00.003+12:002011-05-06T19:43:24.335+12:00Liquid LitterTonight, being a Friday night, my wife and I purchased dinner from a local Chinese takeaway. On perusal of the printed menu board, I noticed that you could order a 1.5 litter drink. A 1.5 litter drink? I wonder what litter flavour consists of.<br /><br />The amusing thing is, that someone had attempted to correct "litter" by placing a slither of semi-transparent sticky tape over one of the "t"s.<br /><br />I guess at the end of the day, "liter" in American format, is closer to litre than litter, though not quite there.<br /><br />See for yourself, go to The Flying Dragon Takeaways in Cambridge, NZ.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-9351507227566157812011-03-26T20:34:00.005+13:002012-01-06T01:24:58.103+13:00Creepy Cricket Fans<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPhxOaZfGq_oTq6KW9CH2rMYd0NJHy3HQ5Qpx1sZs2nzeqOC963CfDWW_H_-fF1siagmegS7B7mfbjqppoX4HjjMWF9kNwM62td3PByi7gOMLuyvDPEiI27fRDK5Jer4COz-HZPjbnae0/s1600/Creepy-Cricket-Fan-Performs-Voodoo-On-Baby-150x150.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5588295103623222338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPhxOaZfGq_oTq6KW9CH2rMYd0NJHy3HQ5Qpx1sZs2nzeqOC963CfDWW_H_-fF1siagmegS7B7mfbjqppoX4HjjMWF9kNwM62td3PByi7gOMLuyvDPEiI27fRDK5Jer4COz-HZPjbnae0/s320/Creepy-Cricket-Fan-Performs-Voodoo-On-Baby-150x150.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 150px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 150px;" /></a><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg487gtxh7X6xjXKUPpDJrC7MZJYphM-VHPwqfQQGKp8atvvZr6-xWY8gAimReAeT0qEOojdZjjEmnEuyoQPKDslGQfK1Jcvq4RF0f_DCSSkWGdl_sFBSEU-EV_sJZB3w5YVObmx_1f2hA/s1600/creepycricketfan.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5588294790637719218" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg487gtxh7X6xjXKUPpDJrC7MZJYphM-VHPwqfQQGKp8atvvZr6-xWY8gAimReAeT0qEOojdZjjEmnEuyoQPKDslGQfK1Jcvq4RF0f_DCSSkWGdl_sFBSEU-EV_sJZB3w5YVObmx_1f2hA/s320/creepycricketfan.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 196px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 294px;" /></a><br />
Cricket is traditionally a gentleman's sport. However, these 2011 World Cup fans caught on camera at two different matches, appear to have come across as rather unusual gentleman.<br />
<br />
The Sri Lankan supporter, firstly pictured, wearing some weird voodoo-type face mask, was filmed in the crowd, poking his tongue towards a (thankfully)fake baby.<br />
<br />
The second picture is of a fan who attended the Bangladesh vs West Indies match, who walked into camera view, and then just stood there, staring coldy straight at the camera, sporadically twitching his face and not smiling at all. He looked so scary. The commentators said the Bangladeshi fans were smiling despite their team losing the match. He certainly wasn't. He would be a good casting option for another movie of <span style="font-style: italic;">The Omen</span>, after all, he looks convincingly evil.<br />
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Here's a couple of links to the respective video footage.<br />
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http://www.totalprosports.com/2011/03/23/creepy-cricket-fan-performs-voodoo-on-baby-video/<br />
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkcJ2Qv3Nwc<br />
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Scary indeed.<br />
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<img alt="" src="file:///C:/Users/WAYNEG%7E1/AppData/Local/Temp/moz-screenshot-2.png" />Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-44206055571770059992011-02-23T20:57:00.007+13:002011-02-23T21:12:06.152+13:00Email Scam<span style="font-weight: bold;">Here's an email scam I received. I read it, and I thought; yeah right ... you've got to be kidding.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">I thought I'd post it here for anyone, who is not familiar with these scams:</span><br /><br /><br /><pre><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Good Day Wayne ,</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">This is a personal email directed to you and I request that it should</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">be treated as such.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">I am the Personal account officer to the late Eng.Randolf</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Grimsey,hereinafter referred to as 'my client' who worked as an</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">independent oil magnate in my country (England) and unfortunately died</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">in a car crash with his immediate family on the 4th of Oct,2005.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Since the death of my client in 4th of Oct, 2005, I have written</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">several letters to the embassy with an intent to locate any of his</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">extended relatives whom shall be claimants/beneficiaries of his</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">abandoned personal estate and all such efforts have been to no avail.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">More so, I have received official letters from our bank in the last</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">few weeks suggesting a likely proceeding for confiscation of his</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">abandoned personal assets in line with existing laws by the bank in</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">which my client deposited the sum of US$8.5 million Dollars.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">On this note I decided to search for a credible person and finding</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">that you and my client bear similar last name, I was urged to contact</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">you, that I may, with your consent, present you to the "trustee" bank</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">as my late client's surviving family member so as to enable you put up</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">a claim to the bank in that capacity as a next of kin of my client.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">I find this possible for the fuller reasons that you bear a similar</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">last name with my client making it a lot easier for you to put up a</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">claim in that capacity. I propose that 35% of the net sum will accrue</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">to you at the conclusion of this deal in so far as I do not incur</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">further expenses.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Therefore, to facilitate the immediate transfer of this fund, you</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">need, first to contact me via this email signifying your interest and</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">as soon as I obtain your confidence, I will immediately appraise you</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">with the complete details as well as fax you the documents, with which</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">you are to proceed and i shall direct on how to put up an</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">applicationto the bank.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">However, you will have to accent to an express agreement which I will</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">forward to you in order to bind us in this transaction.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Upon the receipt of your reply, I will send you by fax or E-mail the</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">next step to take. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">proposal is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any fears as</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">the required arrangements have been made for the completion of this</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">transfer. Like I said, I require only a sole confidentiality on this.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">that will protect you from any breach of the law.For quick and cordial</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">communication I will appreciate you to forward your personal telephone</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">number and fax.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Best regards,</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Mr.Allen Mark.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >Note that this email plays on my surname. How original, same story different words.<br />Don't ever be fooled by this nonsense.<br />They want to rob you of your hard earned cash.</span><br /></pre>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-68525024935011304502011-01-24T20:34:00.002+13:002011-01-24T20:38:45.335+13:00Auckland houses less affordable than New York<div class="ecxSection1"> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><b><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:180%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:18pt;" >Low incomes put buying a home out of the reach of many.<br /></span></span></b></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">New Zealand</span></span> houses are among the world's most expensive when incomes are taken into account - and <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Auckland</span></b><b><span style="font-weight: bold;"> and Tauranga homes are less affordable than those in New York, says a major survey released today</span></b>.</p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Low incomes and high house prices are leaving Kiwis badly off and preventing many from climbing onto the housing ladder.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">The seventh annual Demographia International Housing Affordability Survey of 325 cities and regions has given us the thumbs down, putting New Zealand alongside Australia, Britain, the United States, Canada and Ireland as among the world's worst housing markets.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Four of the eight New Zealand markets surveyed - Auckland, Tauranga, Christchurch and Wellington - were classed "severely unaffordable". The other four - <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Hamilton,</span></b> Napier-Hastings, Palmerston North, and Dunedin - were "<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">seriously unaffordable</span></b>".</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Despite three years of a depressed economy, housing remains out of many Kiwis' reach. The situation has worsened because house prices fell only marginally yet job security lessened and wage rises dried up.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Reserve Bank and Real Estate Institute data were used to measure affordability by taking median house prices and dividing those by gross annual median household income. This gave the house price-income median multiple measure.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><b><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:12pt;" >The ideal income-to-loan ratio is around three times an annual salary</span></span></b>. But in New Zealand it takes 5.3 times the average annual salary to pay for a house. <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">In Tauranga it takes 6.5 times the average annual salary and in Auckland 6.4 times. In New York, it's 6.1</span></b>.</p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Survey co-author Hugh Pavletich, of Christchurch, called for more land to be made available for housing.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">"The Government needs to recognise the importance of dealing with the housing supply issues with urgency, so that New Zealand is more affordable and competitive than Australia. This will encourage young New Zealanders to stay in their own country and contribute to its development.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">"<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">There is much work to do so that New Zealanders do not have to pay any more than three times their annual household income to house themselves. New Zealanders are paying twice what they should be for housing and construction costs are currently twice per square metre what they should be, due to urban planning degrading the performance of the residential construction sector over recent decades</span></b>," Mr Pavletich said.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><b><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:12pt;" >Tauranga is our least affordable city, followed by Auckland, Christchurch, Wellington, Dunedin, Hamilton, Napier-Hastings and Palmerston North.</span></span></b></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">The survey has been criticised by some as pushing right-wing free-market theories and developers' interests. But Brendan O'Donovan, Westpac's chief economist, praised it as useful and said three possible solutions to high house prices included relaxing urban land limits, cutting building compliance costs and imposing a tax on under-used land to discourage developers from hoarding property.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">"The Australian and New Zealand housing markets are so stretched, whichever way you cut it compared to most of the rest of the world. A lot of us are saying if you are trying to get more affordable housing, it's not done by first-home buyer grants but more flexible supply-side measures."</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">This month, Westpac senior economist Dominick Stephens warned home buyers that present below-average fixed term mortgage rates could start rising rapidly.</span></span></p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;">Atlanta</span></span> is the most affordable major city and Hong Kong is the least affordable. <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Sydney has become less affordable than Vancouver</span></b>.</p> <p style="" class="ecxMsoNormal"><b><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:12pt;" >The Knight Frank Global House Price Index out late last year showed New Zealand had one of the world's smallest price falls.</span></span></b></p> <div> <p class="ecxMsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;"> </span></span></p></div> <p><span style=";font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:12pt;"> </span></span></p></div>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-28995433840193080962010-12-30T09:42:00.000+13:002010-12-30T09:44:31.323+13:00Please Divert Your Course<span style="font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:85%;">This is based on an actual radio conversation between a U.S. Navy<br />aircraft carrier (U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln) and Canadian authorities<br />off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995. (The radio<br />conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on<br />10/10/95 authorized by the Freedom of Information Act.)</span> </span> <p><span style="font-size:85%;">Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to<br />avoid collision.</span> </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the<br />North to avoid a collision.</span> </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15<br />degrees to the South to avoid a collision.</span> </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again,<br />divert YOUR course.</span> </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Canadians: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.</span> </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE SECOND<br />LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE<br />ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS<br />SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES<br />NORTH--I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH--OR<br />COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.</span> </p><span style="font-size:85%;">Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.</span>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-15709944858499598622010-11-18T00:22:00.004+13:002011-06-02T19:10:35.357+12:00Calling Extras for The Hobbit.I've read in tonight's news that the call has been put out for extras to be auditioned for The Hobbit.<br /><br />Essential requirements are:<br />- Men and Women aged 17-80 years<br />- Men: MUST be UNDER 170cm (5 foot 7 inches)<br />- Women: MUST be UNDER 158cm (5 foot 2 inches)<br />- You MUST be prepared to be available at short notice<br /><br /><br />It seems that at 176cm tall, I don't qualify. Does anyone have some form of spinal compressing device out there? ... LOL!<br /><br />I guess that with being part way through the process of buying a house, I have enough on my plate at present.<br /><br />So, if you fit all the above requirements and live in the central North Island of New Zealand, opportunity could be knocking at your door.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-47081355351348827372010-09-15T07:02:00.004+12:002010-09-15T07:16:34.196+12:00Bride FlightHi reader<br /><br />I've been a bit slack on maintaining this blog in recent times. Whenever something newsworthy happens, I tend to forget about it when I log onto my machine. Sometimes I even forget that this blog exists. Hopefully, I can turn a corner here. It took me a few attempts to suss out my password.<br /><br />Anyhow, three years ago, I had posted here about being a movie extra for the movie Bride Flight.<br />The movie was finally released on DVD recently. I didn't get around to seeing it during screening at the cinema. My parents informed me that I do appear a few times as an extra in the movie. I have since watched this myself, and identified myself in nine instances. It's not my taste in movies, but it's also not everyday that my mug shot appears in the background of a movie.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-64324792126325077062010-08-11T18:59:00.001+12:002010-08-11T19:02:26.352+12:00Sardines in Oil ... 2010 Style!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdyOS8dQ292YsA4yBPR-OxJzs3uFxKxA8-2Lp0FdmzREUqsQCtekt-NhhkCmlXAU3ZdL0cgxCQ9NpPjI5sUdFUxb5rokKknDf2mGKtdcC7crRue4JkfTelYbCuTN0hAQue7pbkumiQGPs/s1600/Sardines+in+Oil.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 223px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdyOS8dQ292YsA4yBPR-OxJzs3uFxKxA8-2Lp0FdmzREUqsQCtekt-NhhkCmlXAU3ZdL0cgxCQ9NpPjI5sUdFUxb5rokKknDf2mGKtdcC7crRue4JkfTelYbCuTN0hAQue7pbkumiQGPs/s320/Sardines+in+Oil.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504043734996863218" border="0" /></a>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-87001023301328313112010-06-30T17:59:00.001+12:002010-06-30T18:18:37.101+12:00The Rules of Cricket Explained<strong>The rules of cricket explained No. 1: </strong><br /> <br /> The pie metaphor. <p class="BodyText">Right. So the guy from the other team is called a "bowler" and he's trying to knock your pies down before you can eat them. He throws with an overhand motion, releasing the ball before he steps into the crease, usually bouncing the ball on the ground to make it harder for the pie-eater to pick up. To protect your pies, you have a bat, and when he throws the ball, you swing the bat and try to swat the ball away. If you hit it, you and the other pie-eater switch places and then you can eat one of his pies.</p> <p class="BodyText"><strong>The rules of cricket explained No. 2: </strong></p> <div><span class="484392412-12012005"><span style="font-family:Verdana;font-size:85%;color:#0000ff;">You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he is out. When they are all out, the side that's been out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.</span></span></div> <div><span class="484392412-12012005"></span> </div> <p class="484392412-12012005"><span style="font-family:Verdana;font-size:85%;color:#0000ff;">"When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out, he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who are out all the time, and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game.</span></p>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-6730956400960806092010-05-20T20:28:00.010+12:002010-05-20T21:58:42.533+12:00Jury Service OdditiesThis week, I was summoned to attend jury service. Though I constantly got shortlisted to be empaneled for juries on some mornings, I was never selected to be a juror (though I have been a juror on two prior occasions, whilst still living in Dunedin).<br /><br />With the ever colourful idiosyncrasies of human nature being what they are, here are some truly bizarre highlights from this week:<br /><br />Monday: The lady of Asian origins who ended up being a juror, but could not actually understand what was happening. She had to be replaced after the jury of twelve had already selected their foreperson. The judge questioned how this could happen and she was not amused.<br /><br />A juror who had difficulty hearing; - the judge arranged for a court official to purchase headphones from Dick Smith's electronics, so that she could actually hear the proceedings.<br /><br />Wednesday: The de facto couple who were both selected to appear on the same jury. Surely, there was pillow talk during this trial, but hopefully no domestic disputes erupted when they deliberated for a verdict. Myself, and a former work colleague who was also partaking in the jury pool, can not believe how this could actually happen.<br /><br />The woman who's name was balloted to enter the jury box: - she asked the judge to be excused from the trial, as she did not feel able to take part in this particular case. The judge declined her request. Luckily for her, the defense lawyer subsequently issued a challenge, and she was thus eliminated from that jury. A replacement juror's name then had to be drawn from the ballot box.<br /><br />Today (Thursday), another woman already empaneled on a jury of twelve, decided that once their respective foreperson had also been selected, she'd announce to the judge that she did not want to take part in the case, as her spouse/partner is a policeman. The defense lawyer then offered to expend his remaining "challenge". The judge declined the lawyer's offer, and stood the would-be-juror aside instead, A replacement juror then had to be selected.<br /><br />Surely, most people who struggle with hearing, comprehension, or harbour some form of prejudice, declare this sort of information to the court officials before embarking on this stage in the proceedings.<br /><br />There were multi-lingual signs plastered all over the jury assembly rooms, advising people to notify court officials of such issues.<br /><br />All of this comical court entertainment helped, to sporadically humour the otherwise dull <span class="equals">authoritative</span> proceedings for us punters, who were there ... just biding our time and making up the numbers.Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-54608352811762685352010-04-15T18:29:00.001+12:002010-04-15T18:31:31.254+12:00Doctor Joke: Brilliant!<div><span style="font-family:Verdana;font-size:85%;"> <div dir="ltr" align="left"><span style="color: navy; font-size: 18pt;" lang="EN-GB">I </span><u><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 18pt;" lang="EN-GB">love </span></u><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 18pt;" lang="EN-GB">this Doctor! I wonder if he practices locally!</span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br /><br /><br /><img id="ecx_x0000_i1025" src="http://sn124w.snt124.mail.live.com/mail/SafeRedirect.aspx?hm__tg=http://65.55.72.23/att/GetAttachment.aspx&hm__qs=file%3d34e29c5c-5aeb-4436-b2b0-9fe1b70d18f2.jpg%26ct%3daW1hZ2UvanBlZw_3d_3d%26name%3dQVRUMDAwMjkuanBn%26inline%3d1%26rfc%3d0%26empty%3dFalse%26imgsrc%3dcid%253a576143720%254017012010-1DDC&oneredir=1&ip=10.13.120.8&d=d5323&mf=2&a=01_d9af0924861b3920f1ed296d266be8c43af153ba257dc7a4dbc3a87e1210d7a8" width="259" height="285" /></span><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; color: red; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br />Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? </span></b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br />A:Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it...don't waste on exercise.. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap. <b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? </span></b><br />A:You must grasp logistical efficiency. What does cow eat? Hay and corn.<span style="color: navy;"> </span>And what are these? Vegetables. So steak is nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give you 100% of recommended daily allowance of vegetable product.<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?</span></b><br />A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? </span></b><br />A:Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc.<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? </span></b><br />A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...good!</span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; color: navy; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br /> </span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"> </span><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; color: red; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br />Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?</span></b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"> <br />A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these day in vegetable oil. In fact, they permeated by it. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!? <b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q</span></b>: <b><span style="color: red;">Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? </span></b><br />A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach. <b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: Is chocolate bad for me? </span></b><br />A: Are you crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: Is swimming good for your figure?</span><span style="color: maroon;"> </span></b><br />A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle? </span></b><br />A: Hey! 'Round' a shape! <br /><br />Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.<br /><br />AND.....<br /><br />For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies. </span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 13.5pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br /><br />1. The Japanese eat very little fat<span style="color: navy;"><br /> </span>and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.<br /><br />2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat<span style="color: navy;"><br /> </span>and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.<br /><br />3.. The Chinese drink very little red wine<span style="color: navy;"><br /> </span>and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.<br /><br />4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine<span style="color: navy;"><br /> </span>and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. <br /><br />5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats <br /> and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.</span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 18pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br /><br />CONCLUSION:<b><span style="color: red;"><br /><br />Eat and drink what you like.</span></b></span><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"> </span><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; color: red; font-size: 18pt;" lang="EN-GB"><br />Speaking English is apparently what kills you.</span></b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 10pt;" lang="EN-GB"> <br /></span></div></span></div> <div> </div>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-6190472817860315012010-04-06T18:54:00.003+12:002010-04-11T17:50:37.237+12:00When Wombats Attack<p>Quite a few years ago, I was hand feeding a Wombat in Australia. The jolly round little beggar decided that it wanted to have a good go at my fingers. My experience was nothing compared to this unfortunate fellow, as described in the following article from Stuff NZ:<br /> </p><p><br /></p><p>A rare wombat attack has left a Black Saturday survivor with bite wounds to his arms and legs. </p> <p> Bruce Kringle, aged in his 50s, got more than he bargained for when he emerged from his caravan at Flowerdale, north-east of Melbourne, on Tuesday morning, to be attacked by a wombat. </p> <p> Mr Kringle, who is waiting for his new house to be built, was set upon by the wombat which mauled his leg and then managed to pull him to the ground. </p> <p> Kelly Smith, who works at the Flowerdale Hotel, said the wombat then jumped on Mr Kringle's chest and continued scratching him with its claws. </p> <p> "Bruce managed to find an axe and killed it," Ms Smith told AAP. </p> <p> "It's bizarre what happened. </p> <p> "He's okay but the wombat mauled his leg, got him to the ground and then started clawing at his chest." </p> <p> She said Mr Kringle is living in a caravan on his block of land until his house is built. </p> <p> Paramedics cleaned the man's wounds and took him to the Northern Hospital in Epping in a stable condition. </p> <p> Geoff McClure, compliance team leader for the Department of Sustainability and Environment, said a wombat attack was extremely unusual. </p> <p> He said wombats could feel threatened and rush at a person, especially if the animal was suffering from the skin condition mange, caused by parasitic mites. </p> <p> ''In the advanced stages wombats become very irritable and anyone who approaches them, they usually view as a threat and may run towards them,'' he said. </p> <p> ''They appear aggressive but we have never had reports of wombats actually attacking people.'' </p>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-41581273314456469152010-03-09T19:49:00.005+13:002010-03-09T19:55:52.291+13:00Airport Security Event<u><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" ><br /></span></span></u><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:teal;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:teal;" ><br />Customs Official : 'May I know your name?'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" >Passenger : 'Batman'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:teal;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:teal;" >Customs Official : 'What's your name!?'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" >Passenger : 'My name is Bat-man'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:teal;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:teal;" >Customs Official : 'Trying to be funny? What's your surname?'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" >Passenger : 'Super-man'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:teal;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:teal;" >Customs Official : 'So you're telling me your name is Batman Superman?'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" >Passenger : 'Yes'<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:teal;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:teal;" >Customs Official : 'Arrest this guy...</span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;" ><br /><br /><br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" >When they had him in custody, he was asked to show his identification card: (scroll down)<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1WHTTtlOU866ZxEMo2nyaKjbA2XZoQO8_Ae-K7aAZwj21c2V6qEsyuEyhi-v4QY19YIiWADkdqXvxpc3Z4_7OXwo4xLZ5MfzWtzF5ZsU5d0s02USCI_pYmmF1BcYj4T_caczbnVL5XZk/s1600-h/ATT00001.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 244px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1WHTTtlOU866ZxEMo2nyaKjbA2XZoQO8_Ae-K7aAZwj21c2V6qEsyuEyhi-v4QY19YIiWADkdqXvxpc3Z4_7OXwo4xLZ5MfzWtzF5ZsU5d0s02USCI_pYmmF1BcYj4T_caczbnVL5XZk/s320/ATT00001.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5446522776904761090" border="0" /></a><br /><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;color:blue;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:13pt;color:blue;" ><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;" ><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;" > </span></span>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-39653661243320366442010-02-18T18:33:00.003+13:002010-02-18T18:39:26.049+13:00Amazingly Simple Home Remedies<pre><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);">I received this particularly funny list from someone at work. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.</span></span><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER..</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40.. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >DAILY THOUGHT:</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS</span></span></pre>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-20191375985449820872010-02-14T20:43:00.004+13:002010-02-14T20:51:23.004+13:00Philosophical Consumption.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGgFdEAGF2c5tS2UrIPuubMLgM-FSC7wQ1Ag5p4M9iI4Y1t6nfIwQCtwnzLuRbSChOGiX4Y_bazQYI8n-wuy-jB4XIUnCOn2ghbmSjIuEF3dSxmgfyPoyllsjzwkj0V2_m__nyesgpNAE/s1600-h/250px-Flock_of_sheep.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 211px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGgFdEAGF2c5tS2UrIPuubMLgM-FSC7wQ1Ag5p4M9iI4Y1t6nfIwQCtwnzLuRbSChOGiX4Y_bazQYI8n-wuy-jB4XIUnCOn2ghbmSjIuEF3dSxmgfyPoyllsjzwkj0V2_m__nyesgpNAE/s320/250px-Flock_of_sheep.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5438002754718319970" border="0" /></a><br />The philosophy of democracy can sometimes be skewed towards three wolves and one sheep holding a vote to determine what's for dinner!Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-11431897129508871482010-01-09T17:02:00.002+13:002010-01-09T17:11:28.374+13:00More Pointless TriviaThe jellyfish known as <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Turritopsis</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">nutricula</span> is biologically immortal.<br /><br />The word <span style="font-style: italic;">queue</span> is the only word in the English language that is still pronounced the same way when the last four letters are removed.<br /><br />Camels have three eyelids to protect themselves from blowing sand.<br /><br />The placement of a donkey's eyes in its head enables it to constantly see all four of its feet!Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4734440766024696220.post-57638221208129795452010-01-07T21:14:00.003+13:002010-01-07T21:22:40.286+13:00Pointless TriviaBroccoli has an IQ of about 2.<br /><br />The tongue of the chameleon is twice as long as the rest of its body.<br /><br />The eye of the giant squid can reach 15 inches in diameter!<br /><br />Not to be confused: a bibliophile is a collector of rare books while a bibliopole is a seller of rare books.<br /><br />Captain James Gallagher, flew the B-50 Superfortress taking off on February 26, 1949 Carswell Air Force base in Fort Worth, Texas on the first round-the-world, non-stop flight. The plane, carried a crew of 14, averaged 249 miles per hour on the 23,452-mile trip that ended successfully on March 2. The Superfortress was refuelled four times in the air by B-29 tanker planes.<br /><br />The well known 26 mile marathon has actually been 26 miles, 385 yards since 1908. Before the 1908 Olympics the official marathon distance was exactly 26 miles. For the 1908 Olympics in London, England it was decided that the royal family needed a better view of the finish line. The race started at Windsor Castle and organizers added an extra 385 yards to the race so the finish line would be in front of the royal box.<br /><br />From that point forward the marathon distance became 26 miles, 385 yards (42.195 kilometres). The International Assiciation of Athletics Federations (IAAF) adopted the distance as the "official" marathon distance in 1921.<br /><br /> <p>For the only time in recorded weather history, snow fell in the Sahara desert in southern Algeria on February 18, 1979. The storm lasted only half an hour and the snow was gone within hours.</p>Wayne Grimsey (Grimmo)http://www.blogger.com/profile/12911713954669735145noreply@blogger.com0